Monday, 28 January 2008

Wedding Bashers

Recently I’ve been in negotiations about my son and heir’s appearance at a friend's wedding.

Although a boy of such standing and charm should be demanding a fee for semi-public engagements, I’ve actually been trying to limit his appearance at this event to the minimum.

Weddings and children has always been a sticky subject for some.

My first experience of people having contrasting views was actually at my own wedding. I think I’d been too tired-and-emotional at all the previous ones to notice sprogs, or the very lack of them.

“Does our invite extend to our children?” I was asked a couple of times.

My stock answer should have been; ‘Why, oh, why, would you even want it to?’ but I generally stuck to “No, as much as I like your spawn, it doesn’t.”

I appreciate that there are people that don’t have the help I’m blessed with, so offspring can come as even more of package sometimes. And if the question was genuinely a case of; we can’t come without, or would have to leave early if they don’t come - then that is a different matter.

But, for me, weddings aren’t really a place for young children. My Wife agreed. And even when we’d hatched Max, he was only pimped out for an appearance in the church, and on the lovely photos for his Auntie’s wedding (he made them actually, see above, I should definitely charge!).

For me they just limit the participation of others and, in my experience, don’t particularly get enthused by what the top table have to say, or really enjoy waiting an age for silver service.

So, I've lined up an itinerary so fantastic Max will go off to enjoy himself with grandparents, I'll have a great time at the wedding, and the photos will be fantastic. Done, well apart from invoicing for his appearance and image rights.