Monday, 23 March 2009

Mothering Sunday Is Crepe

This somewhat manipulated and morphed event, that has found its way into our annual calendar, has never been more important to me.

As a son, and a person for that matter, I am not a very big fan of acting to a society driven schedule.

Annual days, such as this one, Valentines and Halloween are a load of tripe concocted to make me feel like I should be doing something to signify them.

Get knotted those days.

It is not that I do not appreciate what people do for me, or am unable to demonstrate that practically, I just do not like being forced into celebrating that fact to a national, or international, schedule.

However ‘Mother’s Day’ now has added significance to me, in the reality that my son does not have a living mother to celebrate it with, and therefore I need to actually think about how I choose to handle it.

Others around us are very considerate of our circumstances, probably too much in some cases.

And some were interested in how we, or I, would like to handle the day, and traditions like cards.

I decided that my son should make a card for his mother, and if he wanted to make cards for others, he could do so, but they would be additional.

Everyone was onboard with my plan, with the notable exception of Junior himself.

The first opportunity he got to make a card, I was actually with him, at a playgroup we regularly frequent, that chose to make cards a couple of weeks before Mothering Sunday, as they were planning on ‘making’ biscuits a little closer to it.

We had a good half-hour of making a card, a flower based one from various shades of crepe paper, that we scrumbled up and glued down like the bad-asses that we are.

Craft. Is. Cool.

But my boy was not keen on this card being for his mother, instead insisting it was for Cbeebies.

Which prompted some interesting dialogue between us, and a couple of the nosey more confident around us.


I was not keen on hearing my son’s perceived reluctance to making a card for his mom, but listened to him all the same.

It pays sometimes.

I attempted to explain that although she was not here to receive it, that was no real reason as to not make her a card, and we could make other, additional cards, including for the UK’s number one TV channel for pre-schoolers.

In an ‘I-get-all-that-dad-but’ way, he still insisted that the card should be for his normal channel of choice.

Mildly concerned that my son was choosing television over his mother, a compromise was muted. We would make two cards and pick one out of our works for each.

I gained agreement, but then lost my child’s attention to other things going on at the group, so we never completed the second card.

Instead I let it whirl round my head how he could have come up with such a decision, without really getting any further with that either.

But I need not have worried.

We returned home for lunch, and I switched Cbeebies on while I put it together. However before I made it back to the kitchen, Max pointed my attention to the screen and to their send in request.

Of course they wanted flowers, to signify spring, just like the one we had made that morning.

My son was not choosing anyone over anyone, he simply had put the two and two together correctly.

My maths being a little weaker, obviously.

Have that ‘concern’, and welcome back ‘proud’

He further confirmed his thoughtful side when he decided to make further cards for his daddy and for his granddad.

His granddad’s because he had cut his thumb last week, and the card had become a I-hope-it-gets-better-soon card.

Very thoughtful, and lateral of mind.

On some of our walks to and from nursery and the village playground, my mini-colossus has re-iterated who he has made cards for, reminding me also that our send in card remains undone.

Will have to do something about that later this week.

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8 comments:

MindyMom said...

Kids minds are amazing, aren't they? Sometimes we learn so much from them when we let them guide us through their thought process.

What a great kid you have - probaly due to having such a good dad. ;)

Penelope said...

Having the faith to let Junior work it out for himself sometimes really does pay off huh?
He is a credit to you Ian, and yes I seem to say this a lot lately!

Blogging Mama Andrea said...

He seems to be processing everything just in his own way. He seems to learn a lot from his daddy even when you don't always see it.

I imagine it's a tough day for many reasons but you seem to have given thought to the day and how you'd like your son to honor his mother. I think a card for his mom is a great idea, something you can keep for him when he's older to look back on.

The Dotterel said...

Lovely.

Canadian Bald Guy said...

In what could be a very difficult time for the both of you, things appear to be going as well as they could be.

You're raising a great kid there.

Petra a.k.a The Wise (*Young*) Mommy said...

Awesome kid you have there. And you aren't doing so bad yourself. I can't imagine that it is easy, but you seem to handle it amazingly well.

SciFi Dad said...

Your boy sounds like a remarkable child. It reflects well on you.

Single Parent Dad said...

MindyMom - They are, and we do.

Penelope - It does, and thank you.

Blogging Mama Andrea - That's the plan. Not as difficult a day as you might think. Nothing changes tomorrow.

The Dotterel - Thanks Tim.

CBD - We enjoyed the day, it being mother's day was largely irrelevant. I just want to give him gently reminders.

Petra - I suppose I am doing what comes naturally to me. If I make it look easy, then that's great.

SciFi Dad - Remarkable is a word I use quite a lot!

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