Tuesday, 14 July 2009

Who Got a Black Eye?

Last weekend was a little out of the norm for us.

The boy and I were parted, which is not a totally freak occurrence on its own, I have been on a skiing trip before, and later this year I will go without him to my third V Festival, but I am unsure how much longer he will let me do that unaccompanied.

But this time I was off to sample the delights of Magaluf, on a stag do, and he was off on an adventure between his two sets of grandparents.

As, I am sure is conveyed here too, I am generally sophistication personified, so a three day drinking bender to the worst place on earth is a smidgen out of my new comfort zone.

Whereas a weekend of grandparent manipulation is bread-and-butter stuff to Junior.

I originally agreed to this binge in foreign climes, thinking it would be a great laugh, and that it would be good for us to spend a few days apart before the summer holidays get in full swing.

With, what I thought was, a recent history of enjoying quaffing vast amounts of alcohol, I never really thought through how I may physically cope with such a ‘break’, considering it to not be a problem.

The guy celebrating his last few weeks of freedom is also one I really like, a person who has opened a few social doors for me since Samantha died, and for that I owe him gratitude, and his company is always entertaining too.

Therefore I quickly made a decision to go, on what was initially going to be a four day trip. However Max’s school scheduled a parents’ meeting on what was to be the first day, so I chose to shorten my trip in lieu of attending such meeting.

And as well as being the absolutely right thing to do for Max, it was also the right decision for me, in terms that I would not have enjoyed the extra day abroad anyway.

In the past when we have spent this amount of time apart, and shorter really, I have always tried to make it feel like it is also an ‘adventure’ for my son, as well as for me, never hiding from the fact of how long we shall be apart.

For those reasons, I have also found it works to have Max leave me, rather than the other way round. Like this time, logistically it may have been easier for us both to head to my parents, then me leave for the airport while he was asleep, but I did not feel comfortable with this, so instead I packed my mini-colossus off to my folks for tea, and I stayed put, leaving a little earlier in the morning to get everyone else picked up and to the airport for check-in time.

Once apart, my scheduled was basically full of drinking, no sleeping, staying in a hotel – come half-way house – full of large groups of youngsters, all with similar, if not more experimental, itineraries.

Nights merged into days, all spent in packed streets with drunken children falling over themselves, or their vomit, and a Civil Guard keen to pounce on any behaviour considered undesirable (a policy that needs a radical re-think).

The boy’s plans were full of fairy cakes, trips out, swimming, toy procurement, playing and topped off with a birthday party for one of his friends.

So, which one of us had a black eye when we reconvened on Sunday afternoon?

That is right, not me.

A clash of heads at the party had resulted in my heir getting a little purple around his right eye, which is now considerably purpler.

Prompting, one of my parenting peers this morning, to say; “I thought it was you that went to Magaluf?”

And thus, this blog post.



Melissa said...

Awww, poor Max. Now a mother like me would be eaten up with guilt at this point and would vow to never leave him again. But that's just silly. It is perfectly healthy for you to have some time apart and it's a much needed break for you. But it sounds as though your frat boy days are coming to an end. Age and the realities of life start sending you messages that it is time to put away childish things (at least some of them).

The idea of Max leaving you first is a good one so keep it up as long as you can get away with it. Ian eventually got to the age when he was too old to enjoy going to the Grandparents or a sitter yet he was too young to be left at home by himself. This turned out to be about a six year period of time, so enjoy yourself while you can.

SandyCalico said...

It sounds like Max had the better time, even with the black eye!

Catherine Sinclair said...

It could've been worse: http://timesonline.typepad.com/alphamummy/2009/07/barbara-strikes-again-literally.html . Eeek! It's great Max is so close to his grandparents, there's an African saying "it takes a whole village to bring up a child" and I'm sure he'll appreciate them being them for him as he grows up too.

(ps I'll bet he's proud of his shiner, v manly)

Half Mum Half Biscuit said...

I was sure it was gonna be you!

Kevin Spencer said...

I don't think I could actually do a three day bender anymore. One night out in Magaluf would do me in for days. But it would be a fun night that's for sure ;-)

Penelope said...

As much as I do lurve the wine (and time out from the Lil P's) I don't think I could manage a 4 day binge either! Yes I'm older than you! No it's not by THAT much!

Canadian Bald Guy said...

Is it wrong to think of my son's first (or even second) shiner to be a "badge of honor"?

I'm such a guy.

Anonymous said...

Lol. I love the post. I too am a wee bit scared of such hen/stag dos. I can't even cope drink all day and night at a wedding nevermind a few days!
I recently bought my 4 year old niece out to lunch with a big shiner, she was awfully proud of it. She got it by accidentally headbutting her 1 year old sister. War wounds eh!
Townygirl xx

Crystal Jigsaw said...

Not easy leaving them is it! I would definitely have enjoyed Max's weekend than yours though!!

CJ xx

Milla said...

enforced gaiety is just vile. And in Magaluf, hey, even YOU're 10 years too old for that particular circle of hell. East west, home's best and all that.

T said...

Well, it sounds like SOMEONE had fun.

And yeah, I agree with CBG. Wouldn't that be a badge for a guy? A black eye or a scar?

Jo Beaufoix said...

I have never been to Magaluf. Therefore I am much more sophisticated than you. And I do not dream about Girls Aloud...I don't think.

I wondered about not bringing Miss M to London this weekend as E can't come and my mate Nic is coming with me to meet the Dan-ster, but I just couldn't do it. It will be enough knowing I'll have a week away from them both this time next year with the walk etc. I like your idea of them leaving me and not the other way around too. You are quite wise for a Magaluf visitor.

rosiescribble said...

I bet you panicked like mad when you got back and saw the bruising. There's nothing worse than returning to an injured child! Sounds like Max had the better time though.

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